Confidence
When I was growing up, a silent child was a disciplined child.
Well-behaved kids kept quiet. They didn't disturb. They didn't talk when adults were talking.
When you made a mistake, discipline came fast. But when you did something well? Silence. Nobody told you that you were doing great.
So there was no compass. You knew exactly what you did wrong, but you never knew what you did right. You had nothing to build on.
Church filled some of the gap. It taught us how to behave and how to treat people. But even there, the method was fear. Follow the rules or you go to hell.
Many of us learned to pray about our challenges instead of acting on them. As children, that lowered our anxiety, because we handed the responsibility to God. As adults, it caught up with us. Life demands action, and when prayer alone stops working, the anxiety comes back with interest.
The result is a generation of adults who are capable but quiet. Talented but shy. Full of ideas they never say out loud.
Here is what I know now.
Confidence is not taught. It is experienced. And the more a child experiences it, the stronger it grows.
It starts at the dinner table. Give children a chance to talk about their day. What they liked, what they didn't. Ask them what they value. Let them express their feelings, even when it sounds childish.
Tell them you love them. Hug them. A child who feels loved does not spend adulthood searching for that feeling.
And when they try something, tell them they did it. When they try again, tell them it gets easier. Because it does.
This foundation is not only for the child. It is for the generation that will come from that child.
I am going to raise my children with confidence. The respect stays. The silence goes.
Have you seen this in your own upbringing?